The Adventures of Alex: Toyota Visit to the Catholic Childrens Home

It’s time for another leadership blog… YIPPEE! Hooray! OOOOHHHH Yeah!! Boom, boom, firepower!

But, this leadership lesson isn’t from me. It’s not about influence, character or SMART goals. This lesson isn’t an easy one. It’s from 12 Kentucky students who are at least two years younger than our freshman members. These students live at the Catholic Children’s Home near Toyota’s Erlanger offices and have had to deal with situations most of us can’t even imagine.

But I’m getting ahead of myself. Let’s start at the beginning.

Levy, Chase, Chelsea and I had the privilege of spending a day with these students per request of one of our dedicated sponsors, Toyota. When we met the students, they seemed pretty average. They had just dried off from the pool and almost all of them had multiple silly bands.

We jumped into some pretty regular workshops, completed some fun activities and attempted to teach some leadership lessons. But, they ended up teaching us more than we ever could have taught them.

One moment of the day that has really stuck with me was when Chase asked the students how their lives will change when they get a job. Expecting the typical, “Having money,” “Buying a house,” “Starting a savings account” answers, I didn’t think much of it.

I was blown away by what the students replied.
“Taxes.” “MORTGAGE.” “Getting fired.” “Quitting.”

One of the students even said, “Well you can keep your family and friends if you have a job.”

Timeout: What happened to the days when a kid’s biggest concern was whether Scooby-Doo came on before their bedtime? How could boys and girls be exposed to these big, scary adult words when some of them haven’t even learned to read a chapter book? Isn’t everyone’s childhood a lot like mine?!

It’s called “The Transitive Property of ME (TPOM)” – well, that’s what I just titled it. So many times, we assume that the privileges we were afforded, the family we have, the opportunities we’ve been given, the world that we know is the same as everyone else’s. I’ve had the realization that this ISN’T true on multiple occasions, but I always seem to slip into TPOM.

The day at the Children’s Home helped me snap back to reality once again.
It was evident from the job comments and our conversations the rest of the day that these students didn’t have the same home life that I did. In fact, these students were robbed of part of their childhood and have had to put up a wall to protect themselves from a harsh world they were thrown into WAY too early.

So many kids, like the ones we met at the Children’s Home, have to worry about things we can only dream of. Parents who do drugs. Families ripped apart. No role models to look up to.

Think about how blessed we are! We might not have a perfect life and we may have encountered difficult situations. But, our lives aren’t harder than anyone else’s.
Stop assuming that we are all the same. The TPOM doesn’t apply to our world whether you’ve had a past that looks a lot like the Brady Bunch or a childhood that mimics the beginning of “The Blind Side.” We are not all the same nor are our backgrounds. So stop treating everyone like they are on a level playing field.

We can make a change. We have the power and the opportunity to change those children from the home and other’s future. Be a Big Brother or Big Sister. Start a PALS program in the elementary school. Live a life others would be proud to model.

But until we quit generalizing people’s backgrounds and lumping others into pretty categories, we can’t genuinely care about people and respond with action according to their needs and wants.

Stop presuming that just because you don’t have a problem, that there isn’t a problem. Poverty can be found outside of Africa. Crime surpasses the city limits. Pain is in our backyard. TPOM isn’t realistic because no two lives are exactly the same.
Take responsibility. Seek to understand before telling or giving others what they “need.” Ignorance is not bliss; it’s a lack of ownership.

WE can make childhood sacred again. WE can stand against the ugly forces those kids at the Children’s Home had to experience and live with. WE can do better by taking out the ME.